2008

[14] Little Jackie, ‘The World Should Revolve Around Me’

Little Jackie

Little Jackie is undersung rapper Imani Coppola and her producer cohort Adam Pallin. Imani sing-raps her way through this, one of the catchiest pop tunes of this and any other year, blowing away myriad chart cobwebs to reach the shaky heights of No.14. It’s a little bit Jackson 5, a little bit Jurassic 5, and a whole load of sarky bravado.

In its honour, Junior stretches her cardigan beyond her mother’s tolerance and does star-jumps. She also makes me do star-jumps. I went to a Christmas party last night. Star-jumps. Ooh dear.

[15] Ne-Yo, ‘Closer’

Ne-Yo

Hats in pop. It’s not fashion; these stars are bald as a cue ball. Pete Doherty, Captain Sensible, Linda Perry from 4 Non Blondes, Noddy Holder – all 100% cooters. In the comforting warmth of the studio, while penning and producing songs for the likes of Britney Spears, Paula Abdul, Rihanna and Beyoncé (the peerless ‘Irreplaceable’), Ne-Yo can let his chrome dome run free. But get him up on stage, and those spotlights aren’t going to stand for it.

Sorry, the song: the first real heavyweight of the countdown, a shining example of black American music’s bold ambition, ‘Closer’ is an r’n’b tune in pumping dancefloor clothing. It oozes confidence even as Ne-Yo bemoans his powerlessness.

This was one for the iPod on the bus, as Junior sat and listened carefully. I tapped her on the shoulder a minute or so in and asked if she knew what the song was: “Closer,” was the matter-of-fact reply – and I don’t think I’ve ever played it to her before. She announced it was “dancey”, which I suppose would please the lad.

[16] Sebastien Tellier, ‘Divine’

Sebastien Tellier and Daft Punk's Guy-Manuel de Homem-Christo

Pop fluff of a different hue now, and French dance lord Sebastien Tellier’s audacious, doomed attempt to bring a bit of credibility to the Eurovision Song Contest. More doomed than audacious, because a) there isn’t a great deal of cred to an electro doo-wop number performed by a bloke with a beard (with further fake-bearded backing singers) even if he’s ably abetted by the Daft Punk chap pictured above, and b) it’s never going to work, is it? Eurovision is unsenduppable. In the event, even Sebastien’s zany arrival in a golf cart couldn’t stop the backing vocalists utterly messing up the bop-bop-doo-wop harmonies which make up the essential beauty of the song. A lovely bit of chuckaway pop was lost and a rapt continent was left with a French fellow taking the piss.

Junior pigeonholed ‘Divine’ as a “sitting-down song” and thought it had finished when the beat broke down in the middle. Maybe that would’ve been the moment for M Tellier to sneak off and leave the floor for the mighty Andy Abraham.

[17] H two O featuring Platnum, ‘What’s It Gonna Be?’

H two O featuring Platnum

At the ripe old age of thirtysomething, I’m not supposed to keep up with these new-fangled genres that populate the latest ringtones at the back of the bus – but, somehow, I almost do. This song, along with any number of staggeringly poor and derivative Basshunter hits that have clogged up The Box’s screen-time this year, is an example of that latest pop’n’roll craze, Bassline. Now, it seems to me that Bassline is UK Garage with added Europap, but what do I know? What matters is H two O (crazy name) and their mates Platnum (possibly crazier) made one of the sweetest little pop nuggets of the year. That it appears to be fuelled by a full jar of Kenco (or maybe something a touch edgier – again, who am I to ask?) only adds to the charm.

What we’re dealing with here is uninhibited joy, mixed with those teen fears that the object of those funny feelings in your tummy is not burning with the same ardour. These worries are soon swept aside when the boy and girl start exchanging cuddly words in cute street (Sesame) accents before bursting into yet another ecstatic chorus. It makes me want to dance, but there’s not a ghost of a chance that I’d be able to keep up – thankfully Junior is on hand to go bananas for the entire ferociously fast three minutes; turning circles around her sister and leaving me panting by the stereo, trying to look as if I get it.

[18] Vampire Weekend, ‘A-Punk’

Vampire Weekend

So the critics’ choice of 2008 was a bunchy of preppy American lads doing a Strokesian (look it up) take on Paul Simon’s Graceland. You could’ve seen that coming a mile off. What should’ve been arch, alienating, irritating, pompous, Sting-esque and – frankly – an utter mess, turned out to be the most delightful set of pop tunes since The Sound Of Girls Aloud. That good. ‘A-Punk’ happens to be one of the more conventional arrangements on the album, but it’s so infectious I’m taking the rest of the week off.

You have to catch Junior in the mood and – whereas she usually spins out to all things VW – this time she sat on the rug and asked for, yes, Girls Aloud. She’ll have to wait, probably. If it’s any consolation, Juniorer rocked from side to side, bang on the beat.

[19] Estelle featuring Kanye West, ‘American Boy’

Estelle

Junior recognised this from the mere ambience before the beat slips in – “It’s American Boy!” – and spent at least the first couple of verses shaking booty around the kitchen while dressed in her new hat, scarf and gloves combo. She must have been cooking. Or cookin’, to the schmoove r’n’b rhythms.

The record brims with chutzpah, a bare-faced attempt to grab a slice of the American market. And fair enough; if Britain isn’t going to appreciate its urban stars then why shouldn’t the US? Becoming best buds with John Legend and Kanye West (who muscles in with a hilarious, offbeat cameo here) can’t have done much harm either. Estelle has come along way since I met her working in a video-editing suite, persistently turning up late for work and eventually getting sacked. Video-editing’s loss is truly jazzy hip-pop’s gain.

[20] Hot Chip, ‘Ready For The Floor’

Hot Chip

FITTING START, as this was my favourite single of the whole of, er, January. It seemed like a hard act to follow, but then the rest of the year turned up.

Still, it has all the hallmarks of a great early-year single, with a chorus that’s as catchy as a looping miss-hit to short leg (or something – does anyone know anything about cricket?) and lighter-than-air synths that lift the load of post-Christmas sluggishness. True to its name, it’s also a sop to your dancing feet – and Junior takes that to heart with a high-speed groove around the kitchen. There are songs in this chart that she’ll be more familiar with, so full sing-alongs will have to wait.

As for Hot Chip, this is a bright spot in a curiously patchy career. They possess semi-gems like ‘Over & Over’ – and really their style should be right up my street – but I don’t think they have it.

[5] Bomb The Bass featuring Justin Warfield, ‘Bug Powder Dust’

I’m getting weary legs as we stagger towards the 1994 finish – but hey, the thrilling 2008 Top 20 countdown begins a week today! Make a note in your Smash Hits diaries, pop fans.

This is an excellent record and everything; I’m just feeling tired today. Let’s see if I can pep myself up simply by talking about Justin Warfield’s pseudo-intellectual cut-up flow and Tim Simenon’s aggressive electro motor beats. Warfield was ever keen on styling himself as a beat poet and ‘Bug Powder Dust’ is ripe with Burroughsian word clashes and good sounds – verbal and musical – as he waggles his beatnik head to Simenon’s spiky Brit-house. It’s cool and rules, although I think I prefer Warfield’s own ‘Fisherman’s Grotto’. Ok.

We do the bus-listening trick again, reprazenting in the priority seats by the door. Junior rolls her shoulders and twists her hips before announcing at the end, quite unnecessarily, “That made me dance.”

[1] Blondie, ‘Heart of Glass’

Pick a card, any card.

An unholy marriage of rock and disco? One unlucky shuffle and you could get Electric Six.

A dazzling blonde singer backed by some lens-shattering blokes? Have Transvision Vamp. Or, at a stretch, Shakatak. Or, if you’ve broken a mirror recently, here’s Generation X.

Now you know how damned lucky we are to have Blondie, and ‘Heart of Glass’. Their place in pop’s firmament was sealed by this record, punk poise not misplaced but overshadowed by complete understanding of the mechanics of disco. It’s atypical, of course, and yet fits seamlessly between ‘Hanging On The Telephone’ and ‘Sunday Girl’ in the rich run of sterling singles Blondie dashed off in the late ‘70s/early ‘80s. They showed a taste for adventure rarely matched, and could even consider their gorgeous singer a bonus, not an essential selling point – let’s not pretend she didn’t help, mind you. Still, looks aside, Debbie Harry’s presence (dear) is a boon on ‘Heart of Glass’ for her casual juggling of comforting coos and acid dismissals. The velvet glove.

For all its diverse ingredients, this is a dance record – and we danced en masse. Junior 2 shook her shoulders in the style patented by both mum and big sister, while Junior herself watched with widening eyes as the groove burst out of the click-track intro. It’s a pleasure to see pop music’s greats hitting the spot; one of the reasons we’re here.

Extra, extra: in a victory for ambition over commonsense, I plan for us to tackle 1994 now, hoping to finish it in time for the feverishly anticipated 2008 Top 20 – which in turn I have mad ideas of finishing on or around Christmas Eve. Who’s with us?

2008 Top 20 Singles?

Halfway through the year, always looking for delaying tactics and ways to ramp up the tension for the year-end countdown, here’s a minor indicator – the Top 20 Most Played 2008 Singles on my iPod thingy.

[1] Martha Wainwright, ‘Bleeding All Over You’
[2] The Ting Tings, ‘Great DJ’
[3] Laura Marling, ‘Ghosts’
[4] Alphabeat, ‘Fascination’
[5] Fleet Foxes, ‘White Winter Hymnal’
[6] Coldplay, ‘Violet Hill’
[7] The Ting Tings, ‘That’s Not My Name’
[8] Death Cab For Cutie, ‘I Will Possess Your Heart’
[9] MGMT, ‘Time To Pretend’
[10] Lykke Li, ‘I’m Good, I’m Gone’
[11] Coldplay, ‘Viva La Vida’
[12] Santogold, ‘L.E.S. Artistes’
[13] Portishead, ‘Machine Gun’
[14] Vampire Weekend, ‘Oxford Comma’
[15] Laura Marling, ‘Cross Your Fingers’/’Crawled Out Of The Sea’
[16] Hercules And Love Affair, ‘Blind’
[17] The Shortwave Set, ‘No Social’
[18] Goldfrapp, ‘A&E’
[19] H ‘two’ O featuring Platnum, ‘What’s It Gonna Be’
[20] Foals, ‘Red Socks Pugie’

Admit it. You’re astonished.