jackson 5

[14] Little Jackie, ‘The World Should Revolve Around Me’

Little Jackie

Little Jackie is undersung rapper Imani Coppola and her producer cohort Adam Pallin. Imani sing-raps her way through this, one of the catchiest pop tunes of this and any other year, blowing away myriad chart cobwebs to reach the shaky heights of No.14. It’s a little bit Jackson 5, a little bit Jurassic 5, and a whole load of sarky bravado.

In its honour, Junior stretches her cardigan beyond her mother’s tolerance and does star-jumps. She also makes me do star-jumps. I went to a Christmas party last night. Star-jumps. Ooh dear.

[8] Hanson, Mmmbop’

I think it was The Face that described Hanson’s cherubic looks as “Kate Moss crossed with Kurt Cobain, Kate Moss crossed with Little Jimmy Osmond and Kate Moss crossed with Desert Orchid”. The big bruv did always look as if he’d be happier leaping the fence and getting away, but what would he do? The middle lad was the talent. It was like Jermaine and Michael, without the raging madness – as far as I’m aware.

‘Mmmbop’ has some of the starburst thrill of ‘I Want You Back’, but where the Jackson 5’s debut hit united the people, this just annoyed the arse off them. Precocity, you love it or hate it, it depends who’s delivering it. Plenty bought this – it was a No.1, for pity’s sake – and they can’t all have been kids. Um, there was me for a start.

Well, it’s a true pop moment, with zip and scratching, and some classic, poorly enunciated lines. It’s all about friendships that last and friendships that disappear in the blink of an eye. I think. Who cares? Junior saw its value as a ‘dance with your dad’ floorburner, her experience enhanced by not having to see their Moss hybrid chops.