status quo

[46] Franz Ferdinand, ‘Take Me Out’

Take Me Out

Wasn’t it lovely to see such well-turned-out boys doing synchronised dance moves with their guitars, like a bank-clerk Status Quo? A glossy take on antecedents Orange Juice and Josef K, they were a British (not Scottish; come on, the whole union supports them when they’re successful) counterpoint to scuzzier new wave revivalists from the States, with grooves, tunes, wit and freshness to make them appear original. Somehow it’s been an exercise in water-treading since, but ‘Take Me Out’ still buzzes – although oddly, it sounds slower now.

Junior says: Nothing. Her feet do the talking, as do her sister’s. Synchronised. Music for girls to dance to.

Best bit: The hulking riff we’ve all been waiting for. We know it’s coming and we build up to it like we’re in Toy Dolls.

[3] Franz Ferdinand, ‘Take Me Out’

Franz Ferdinand

A tremendous, not-so-inevitable skew on the new-new wave mania scorching the pop earth in the early Noughties, Franz Ferdinand swaggered in all-literate-like with Wiry rhythm and Blondie hit chops. That audacious aim to “get girls dancing” found full flower here in Junior’s neck-crick nodding in the back seat as the enormous riff kicked this song off proper.

Is there a more pleasing sight than two grown men throttling their guitars to synchronised steps? Alex Kapranos and Nick McCarthy were the new Rossi and Parfitt, the new Mud, the new Shadows – well-turned out gents who knew the value of fancy footwork, the limitations of rock shapes. If ‘Take Me Out’ – the tripartite axe-slinging beauty – could get them skipping in time, the girls would be a cert.

Der-der-der:

Band Aid/Band Aid 20, ‘Do They Know It’s Christmas?’

As a globally conscious 12-year-old, I spent my hard-won cash on the single like millions of others. I was struck by how much one of the Ethiopian children on the cover looked like Bob Geldof. Yesterday morning, Junior was subjected to the original and the recent remake – she was lucky that I couldn’t find the awful Stock Aitken Waterman version, or I would’ve carried out my threat to play one a day ‘til Christmas.

I’m one of the few who admits to liking the 1984 song. I’m one of the even fewer who can see value in 2004’s edition. I like Thom Yorke’s piano. The Darkness guitars are dreadful, though, and it goes on way too long. Also, don’t we get proper heavyweight pop stars any more? There’s hardly anyone on the later record to compete in terms of fame, glamour, ego and interest with the likes of Simon Le Bon, George Michael, Boy George, even Sting. I bet Status Quo weren’t plying Will Young and Jamelia with Class A drugs.

Junior can’t see what any of the fuss is about. She manages to laugh near the Dizzee Rascal bit, and I can see her wondering who Glenn Gregory is. Or was.